temris

Uzun zamandır bir kitabı okurken bu kadar sinirlenmemiştim. Yapmayı en çok sevdiğim aktivitelerden biri olan kitap okumayı bana zehir eden bu kitabı bitirmeden bırakırdım ama maalesef aldığım bir ders için bitirmek zorundaydım.

Neresinden başlamalıyım, onu bile bilmiyorum. Çünkü kitabın kendisi de karmakarışık. Ama her şeyin başı bence yazardan başlıyor: Yazar ve onun bildiklerini gösterme çabası. Örneklemede hiçbir sorun yok, ne derler işte, anlatımı zenginleştiren öğeler vs. ama dakika başı, her cümlede bunu yapıp devam eden cümlelerde, paragraflarda HATTA BÖLÜMLERDE bile buna kalkışması bende kusma hissiyatı uyandırdı. Geçiyorum, geçiyorum; hala aynı konudayız. YETER YAHU, ANLADIK. Bir iki sayfa değil, bazen yirmi sayfa geçtiği halde bir adım ilerlemiyor hikaye. NEDEN YANİ ????? NEDEN? Mesela Nihade kokularla uğraşıyor diye İKİ BÖLÜM (hatta belki daha fazla) boyunca hangi koku neden çıkar, nereden gelmiştir vs. BUNLARI ANLATIYOR. YAHU BİRKAÇ PARAGRAF YETERDİ, ANLADIK ARAŞTIRMA YAPMIŞSIN YAZARKEN.

Üstelik de biçimi de farklı değil. Sürekli. Vurgu. İçin. Böyle. Yazmaya gerek yok!!!! (ALLAHIM DAHA DEMİN BİTİRDİM KİTABI SİNİRLERİM HALA ÜZERİMDE.) Virgül kullan çok istiyorsan yani, sana bir lütuf verilmiş virgül gibi, KULLAN İŞTE SANKİ PARA ÖDÜYORSUN VİRGÜLE.

KONUSUNUN NE OLDUĞUNA DA KARAR VEREBİLMİŞ DEĞİL. Önce istiyor bir karakter üzerinden ilerlemek, başlıyor isimsiz yeniçeriyi anlatmaya. (AMA ANLATAMIYOR, çünkü dediğim gibi tarihi olaylara benzetmekten, örnekler verip bilgisini göstermekten KARAKTERİ OLUŞTURMAYI UNUTMUŞ. İsmi geçen hiçbir “karakter”in, karakteri yok çünkü! HİÇBİRİNİN YOK. Hepsi sadece “isminden” ibaret. Yok Nihade’yi seviyormuş, aşıkmış – ki aşk da değil hissettiği, o ayrı konu.) Sonra gidiyor, kronolojik olarak Osmanlı’nın düşüşüne girip yeniçerilerin lağvedilmesine dönüyor işleyiş. Her bölüm aynı çizgiden devam edecek diye bir şey yok da, yaptığı şekil de aşırı düzensiz. Cilt olmasa birlikte durmayacak kitap.

Bu tutarsızlık biçimsel de gösteriyor kendini: Başlarda eski kelimeleri, eski tamlamaları kullanmaya çalışıyor yazar; sonra vazgeçiyor, modern kelimelere dönüyor. Bunu batılılaşmaya falan gönderme olarak yaptığını hiç zannetmiyorum, sadece DİĞER HER ŞEY GİBİ bunda da kararlılık sağlayamıyor.

AMAÇ NE?? AMAÇSIZ BİR KİTAP BU. Bize bir şey öğretmek ise, yeni öğrendiğim belki bir iki şey vardır ki bu da aşırı alakasız konulardandı, en fazla “trivia” olur yani. Yok, bu daha çok “character study” ise O DA YOK Kİ İŞTE DEDİM YA, KARAKTERİN KENDİSİ YOK ÇÜNKÜ!! HİÇBİR ŞEY YOK BU KİTAPTA!!! İnsanda oluşturduğu tek bir his var, o da kaybolan zamana duyduğum hüzün. Öyle ki bu hüzün, okurken sinirlenip bu yazıyı yazdığım zaman bahsederim, dediğim diğer düşünceleri bile unutturdu şu an.

SORMAK İSTEDİĞİM TEK ŞEY VAR, HOCAM NİYE BU KİTABI OKUTTUNUZ YANİ?

(crossposted from my goodreads)

I've actually had a long post ready, but I accidentally closed the tab while typing. I saved it as a private post, so the autosave wasn't working either. And since it was too long, I didn't want to write it all over again.

It's just that I've been through a very tiring week going through two sicknesses, barely recovering from one -- the other has been killing me since the start of August. I also complained a lot about the prices of medication, and I had to work (thankfully, from my desk at home but I couldn't even keep my head up, and right after I threw up) with a fever to be able to compensate the cost -- to top it all, I took three different exams on three different days to pass the prepatory year for the university (I hope I pass...) so that means: more to pay for transportation. Imagine my annoyance at this week!

Thankfully it's over for now. I have to renew my bus card since I'm a student again (still feels very weird, and I re-thought my choice a lot) but I have to use the card again to get to the place where I can renew it... So it's again going from my wallet... *sigh*

I just want to crawl up on my bed and don't get up.

I can finally write this entry that I've been planning for days on my mind... I just didn't have the time.

( Transfer window )

( Europa League )
Apart from Galatasaray, I want to talk about Thomas too. 😘

( Thommi rant )
I had some more things I wanted to talk about, but I can't really remember now. I have to return to studying, so I'll stop now. :)

I started rereading this manga once again even knowing I have so many things I was annoyed with, just because 1. This manga actually starts up pretty heartwarming, wholesome and actually doesn't have the main fat protagonist getting skinny (unsurprisingly uncommon in manga) 2. Has a nice second lead I liked reading.

And today's rant is about some reader's complaints about said second lead Hiyama.

He made such an impression on me that by the end of my reread (from a scanlation that stops at ch. 37 sadly) I actually had trouble remembering the name of the main male lead LMAO. (His name is Tagami.)

As expected, people were annoyed by the second lead's first appearance - which I found weird because he acted a lot better with Tsumugi than I found Tagami ridiculous sometimes. But the comments started to get positive further chapters, even people wishing her to end up with Hiyama instead. (Which I've been a part of ever since the first time I've read this for the first time when I was in high school LOL)

I went to look if the manga had ended and it did around 2017 - a shame that the scanlation never finished. I would have loved to help translate but my Japanese isn't at such a level where I am comfortable translating, but I might just take a look at Korean raws if I ever have time 👀

Anyway, what I want to say is that one of the reviews annoyed me on that website, and some more people also agreed on the "fact" that "Hiyama also wasn't completely at the right" because "he made advances towards Tsumugi knowing she has a boyfriend". Which is complete bullshit, and I will explain why.

None of the cute moments happened between them started out "intentional", their relationship always "advanced" because of Hiyama's honest personality, and his way of seeing Tsumugi - a person first, instead of how Tagami always mentioned that she had gotten his attention because of her appearance. No matter how later it is explained that Tagami started "to like" her because "she wasn't like those other chubby girls who hated their chubbiness". Now, to be fair, Tagami doesn't blame those girls either which gave me a surprise and I thank the mangaka for not making their ML do the bare minimum.

Besides their natural chemistry, Tsumugi never had to do anything for Hiyama, like how she always has to "provide her chubbiness" to Tagami. (Many instances happened where Tagami told her not to get skinny is also uncomfy a little, ngl.)

Another thing I need to mention is that most of the time Tagami gets so easily jealous that even her friend Mami and Tagami's sister, and his friend Seiji also complained about it. Even Tsumugi herself likened him to her little sister who IS IN KINDERGARTEN. Now why am I mentioning this? Because many also said that it was normal for a guy to get jealous about seeing "their girl" with another guy. Thing is, the guy in question never intentionally tried to spend time with her to have anything romantic with her, anyting that happened was for something Tsumugi was responsible of (like being a part of the committee, I mean like she had a reason to be around Hiyama). And even if we don't count that, nothing that "romantic" even happened between them, perhaps maybe carrying her princess style at his first apperance :P And hey, even then Hiyama didn't have any other thoughts doing that than helping her (carrying her to the infirmary because she hurt herself). So this complaint also doesn't really make sense.

To be honest, that same reviewer finished their review with saying "this is why Japanese people don't want westerners to read their manga" which is ridiculous and completely overrides anything of substance they might have claimed. How they made this average story about a fat girl and a handsome guy shojo romance, about difference in cultures between "the West" and Japan is beyond me.

I guess this is about it. I was drawing some Billy again and I just had to take a moment to rant somewhere because my thoughts were busying me.